I was thinking of excuses people have for not going to church, and I decided to apply the logic to other areas of life. For the record, I wear deodorant. Give me the clinical sweat-proof, stress-tested, smell-good brands, please! But enough about my deodorant, which is probably the one word in the English language that I have the most trouble remembering how to spell.
Why I don’t wear deodorant:
1. There are too many types to choose from
2. A friend of mine wore deodorant and I don’t like the way she smells.
3. I tried a kind of deodorant once. I didn’t like it.
4. What if I wear it the wrong way?
5. I don’t know if I fit in with other people who wear deodorant.
6. I don’t need deodorant to smell good.
7. What if someone wants to know what kind of deodorant I’m wearing? I won’t know what to say.
8. I might offend someone who wears a different brand of deodorant.
This is where I left off. Got any more?
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What if I forget to wear it one day and smell? people will think I’m a hypocrite.
-I shouldn’t have to change the way I smell to be accepted.
-I used to wear deodorant, but other deodorant-wearers got in an argument over the best deodorant ingredients and it made me doubt my belief in deodorant.
-People might make fun of me for wearing deodorant.
-i was allergic to this one deodorant. It flat out rejected me so I must be allergic to all kinds of deodorant.
-all deodorants want is for me to buy them. Why is it always about the money?
-i don’t like this one company that makes deodorant so i refuse to be associated with any kind of deodorants.
-i din’t like how deodorant changes me. I am who i am and everyone should just accept how i smell.
-please don’t push your deodorant on me. Everyone that loves deodorant keeps telling me that i need it but i know that they wish they were as free as i am. I’ve even heard them pray for me to wear it.
-who has time to put on deodorant? “Ain’t nobody got time for that!”
-i was told not put on deodorant because i hadn’t taken a bath. I guess i’m suppose to be clean and i don’t understand how baths really clean. If i take a bath doesn’t that mean i’m clean so i don’t have to wear deodorant? It’s just so confusing. I’d rather not do either.
You were on a roll…on…. Roll-on. Get it? 🙂
My parents forced me to wear deodorant when I was a kid. It turned me off to all kinds of deodorant!
A lot of people who wear deodorant still stink, so I don’t see the point.