Where is Chivalry?

Chivalry is not dead.

It’s just being strangled to death.

By us girls.

A guy holds open a door, only for us to say, “It’s okay, I got it.” and wait for him to enter first.

{ wheeze }

We block our side of the car, hand on door handle, waiting for him to push unlock.

{ pant }

We ask him out on a date.

{ cough }

We pick him up for the date.

{ gasp }

Then we pay for the date.

{ thud }

We just killed chivalry.

Photo Credit

Chivalry is associated with honor, respect, and courtly love. In medieval times, chivalrous men were knights. Today, we call them gentlemen.

We can be independent, strong women and allow men to be courteous and gentlemanly.  Why shouldn’t we allow men to open our door? We know we can open it ourselves, but that boy’s mama trained him well, so let him act!

As the mother of three adorable boys who I foresee growing up to be heartbreakers, I know that respect of women must be ingrained in them from birth.

From birth.

It’s important for my boys to respect me not only as their mother, but also as a woman.

Common sense tells me that the boys will quickly grow taller than their 5’3″ mother, and I need to know that they will respect my voice when their physical prowess is stronger than mine.

Photo Credit

Giving guys the opportunities to be chivalrous does not make us weak, needy, or insecure. In fact, it’s the complete opposite. It shows that you are confident and expect to be treated like the awesome woman you are.

When a boy demonstrates courtesy to you, accept it!!! Do not make fun of him or try to take over.

Allow boys the opportunity to be chivalrous.

Slow down when you’re approaching or exiting a building and allow your guy to hold the door.

If he offers you his seat, take it.

Allow him to carry something heavy for you.

Wait a moment before getting out of the car and allow him the chance to serve you by opening it first.

Keep your hands in your lap for a minute when the check arrives to see if he reaches for it.  See the Dating Rule on Eating for more about that!

Photo Credit

Allow the guy in your life to exercise what he was taught growing up. You deserve to be treated preciously, so let him! A man willing to treat you like a lady is man worth keeping.

My challenge for you today is to allow a guy an opportunity to be chivalrous, and remember to tell him thank-you.

Love you all.



**Disclosure of Material Connection: Some of the links in the post above are affiliate links. This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will add value to my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.

Bethany Jett

Bethany Jett loves sipping coffee and jamming in her planner while raising three boys with her college sweetheart Justin.

April 16, 2012

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1 Comment

  1. Anonymous

    My five year old opens the door for me and announces with a wave of his hand, "Ladies first". It is adorable. What is even more heart melting is the smile on his face, eyes searching for appreciation, with a posture of pride. It takes a lot of restraint not to scoop him up and smother him with kisses. But I walk through the door with a smile I cannot hide, then pause for him to get over the threshold too, and with a heart felt "thank you" we march on. Mother and gentlemen both in training.