Dating Rule #6: Set High Standards

My shortest relationship lasted 45 minutes.
A friend of a sandy-haired boy who sat across from me in sixth grade homeroom approached me after the bell rang.
“My friend likes you. Will you go out with him?”
I’d never gone out with a boy before. But, I agreed. I went to my next class, unable to concentrate. What did this mean? Was I supposed to sit with him at lunch? Was I supposed to kiss him?
I wasn’t even sure I could pick out the sandy-haired boy in a crowded lunchroom.
Turns out, I didn’t have to.
On my way to the cafeteria, the friend of the sandy-haired boy found me.
“He doesn’t like you anymore. He wants to break up with you.”
I nodded, and retreated to my normal lunch table.
In less than an hour, I was surprised, confused, accepted, and rejected.
Photo Credit
Why do we do this?
Why did I agree to “go out” with a boy I didn’t know and who didn’t even have the decency to ask me himself?
It’s amazing what we agree to in order to feel wanted.
After eating lunch that day in silence, I wondered if it was a joke. Maybe the sandy-haired boy and his friends were laughing that I had been “dumped” before anything started.
Maybe it was a joke, maybe it wasn’t. Either way, my spirits were crushed and I was always skeptical of anyone who showed interest in me after that.
Photo Credit
Instead of letting that day to affect my self-worth for many years to come, I should have chalked it up to sixth-grade immaturity and moved on.

After all, the Bible says self-worth comes from what God thinks about us. And what God thinks about me is pretty awesome. He says He chose us before the foundations of the world (Ephesians 1:4) and that we are created in His image (Gen 1:26-27).

That verse is especially cool now that I’m a parent. I watch our six-year-old son, Jeremy, behave exactly like how I envision my husband acted at that age. When Justin gets frustrated with Jeremy, sometimes I say, “Honey, he’s just like you.” and suddenly the frustration eases a little.

However, our naughtiness is not a reflection of God, who doesn’t sin, but don’t you wonder if when you do something really great, like obey your parents without talking back, or bite your tongue when someone is mean, that an angel nudges God and says, “she’s just like You.”

So for all the times we allow people to hurt our feelings or make us feel less than awesome, let’s remember how cool God thinks we are and how much He loves us. If I had remembered that, it would have eased the pain of rejection a little. 

Girls, let’s bid farewell to all the sandy-haired boys and their friends who make us feel insecure.

And we’ll not give away any of our 45 minutes to anyone like that again.

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**Disclosure of Material Connection: Some of the links in the post above are affiliate links. This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will add value to my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.

Bethany Jett

Bethany Jett loves sipping coffee and jamming in her planner while raising three boys with her college sweetheart Justin.

March 11, 2012

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1 Comment

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    You're beautiful! He was crazy to have his friend break up with you. 😉